


Let me Kiss you

by Givexmexempty



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Frerard, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-17 03:54:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29343909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Givexmexempty/pseuds/Givexmexempty
Summary: Gerard ruined his friendship with Frank Iero, the cool dude that was his best friend since they were babies.After ten years of leaving Frank without a logical explanation, he met him by chance on his brother's birthday...
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Comments: 5
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

Gerard hated airplanes. He hated fly and being surrounded by strange and unhygienic people, who used to sneeze on his hands and then touches everything around. Specially kids. Oh,God. He hated kids.

Well...not didn't really hate kids but he didn't known much people with kids on his family or his friends. They were almost workaholic guys with zero time for having an own family.

He was sad but being in a plane getting away form the person how make him sad in the first place was pretty therapeutic. He practically run away of his problems once again. Yeah, it wasn't the first time he took a plane trip to escape from his problems...

All he knew was he doesn't have a husband anymore. No, because the traitor had been cheating on him since the beginning and he'd been too blind to see the signals, even if his own mother suggested once it could be possible. He just couldn't believe someone so polite and quiet like Grant could be capable of cheating. But after all, yes he was capable. Once, twice, more than three or five times. God, could have been ten times...

Gerard just found out thanks to a mutual friend who saw Grant with a young blonde guy in a club. It could have been just friend or whatever, but Grant had told him he was at his mother's, because she was sick. Not in a club, which was totally acceptable in their relationship, cause he didn't need to lie when he was going out...Gerard always believed both were open mind people, who don't have to give permission to the other to go out to parties with friends, and with enough respect to not cheat and fuck other men. But it was only him, Grant was secretly different.

After he cried a little, he said to himself that maybe it was a misunderstanding, so he drove to Grant's mother house, a bit nervous because he just couldn't believe what Monique (the common friend between him and Grant) was saying about his husband.

But Grant's mother said he didn't visit her since two months ago, when they both had been there. So he hugged her tight because maybe it was going to be the last time he saw her.

"You know what?"Gerard said to Grant, after the fucker returned home, two days later. Grant was cooking something and talking like nothing happened about the comic he was working on. Gerard didn't have any proof of him with the young blonde guy, but if Grant lied about visiting his mom, well...

"What?"Grant asked, smiling because he didn't know his husband discovered his little lie...

"I just bought a ticket to go to New Jersey" Gerard said, from the kitchen door. Grant looked at him confused.

"Why?" he asked, putting a spatula on the table "What happened? Something in your family?" Grant wanted to know, because Gerard didn't travel to New Jersey since two years ago, and he didn't travel too much unless it was something from work. His mother family was still living in Jersey, after he moved to Scotland with his father when he was eighteen.

"I need to think"

"So you fly to the other side of the world to just think?" Grant asked, with a grin, running a hand on his bald head.

"And to be apart from you..." Gerard added and the smile on Grant's lips died. He took off the stupid apron he was using and put it on the table, next to the spatula.

"What?" Grant asked, his muscles tensing and his knuckles turning white because the force he used to grab the surface of the kitchen table.

"Somebody told me you prefer blondes now..." Gerard spilled the bomb, hoping his husband seems confused but all he can see was two eyes filled with guilt and desperation.

Grant stood there opening and closing his mouth like a fish, running a hand over his bald head.

Gerard made an angry, (mixed with humiliated) sound with his throat and leave the kitchen without listening to Grants useless begs and mumblings.

Gerard was married with Grant for five years, since he had twenty three, after he was capable of got over an old crush he had on his childhood friend.

He was not fully healed from that cause it wasn't something he could rid off so easily, but he met Grant working on a comic company, and after a year of dating him he received a ring inside a plastic bag with a special edition (super rare) of a Wolverine comic, in the middle of a friend party.

He married Grant who was a couple years older, and lived with him in Scotland, because that's where he was since he abandoned New Jersey and went to his father's house, after finishing school.

So, after a day he was sit on a plane, wishing not to catch any viruses from people sneezing and coughing, thinking in how miserable his life would be from now on, all lonely and without a partner. But he couldn't just pretend nothing happened and go back with Grant. He wasn't a secure person, so trusting someone wasn't an easy thing to do, and when he accepted Grant as his husband, he didn't think in cheating him. Ever.

He was in love with Grant? 

Gerard wondered that for five years, convincing himself that's the better he could do. Be in love with a handsome guy, with a good job and a beautiful house. But if it was totally true, why after all these years he still had that picture on his wallet? Between all the tickets and shitty stuff, he keep a fifteen years old picture of him, Mikey, Ray and Frank.

Frank.

He was his little torment. The only thing which was sticked on his Jersey memories like glue. He was capable of not thinking on his own brother for a couple days, but he remembered something related to Frank like ten times a day.

They were best friends since preschool, when his mom was late to pick him up and he was crying and Frank's mother took pity of him and they waited for Donna in the school entrance.

Their mothers talked a lot since then, and Frank started to being at his side every day, impressed with his first drawings, and sharing his food when Gerard and his clumsy hands spilled his lunch on the table when they were on first grade. He was there every time kids want to beat up Gerard, giving kicks and punchs for him. Frank'd been there for him, until Gerard couldn't stop the feeling of liking him other way.

At first, when he was fourteen, he thought it was just mixed signals. He was misreading Frank touches and hugs, because the guy was really affectionate, but when he started to date girls, Gerard realized how much pain it causes to him.

He wanted to kill Frank's girlfriends, but put a fake smile on his lips when they were hanging out in group, Mikey and his own girlfriend included. He dated a guy named Brendon, but only to not being the only one without a date.

Brendon was a good guy, but Gerard never allowed him to kiss him too much and for every sexual advance he does, Gerard invented millions of excuses to get rid of him. So eventually Brendon left him, and he didn't have a date again because it was too hard to pretend all the time being in love with someone who wasn't Frank.

He was eighteen, Frank met a girl named Jamia. He tried to hate her but she was really nice and cute, a bit chubby and was different to Frank's past girlfriends. She dressed normal, had poor make up skills and wasn't so stunning like all the other girls, but Frank was madly in love with her. Gerard saw him staring at her like he was the most precious thing in the world, and he knew his stupid crush on Frank needed to stop. She was kind, smart, funny, and Frank deserved something good on his life, and Jamia deserved Frank. So he stopped trying to hate her and started to plan how to get rid of his emotions towards Frank.

Of course he took the faster way and stop seeing him, hoping it was enough to convince himself it was just a temporary crush.

Mikey suggested to him to just say to Frank all about his feelings, but Gerard assure him he wasn't in love with Frank. He called Mikey a nosy bitch and tried to continue with his life, even if Mikey looked him with that pity look every time he rejected Frank's invitations to go out.

After finishing school, he called his dad who lived in Scotland, and ask him to allowed him there because he wanted to go to art school in that place.

He moved to Scotland, without any previous warning to his friends, and just say goodbye to everyone with a short hug a day before he took a plane, included Frank, who cried and asked him to call and "please keep in touch", but Gerard never answered his calls or messages, and banned Mikey from try to put Frank in contact.

Mikey partially understood his decision, because he didn't see any hint of Frank being gay and would leave Jamia for Gerard, so he eluded Frank's questions about Gerard and after a year his brother name stopped being a subject.

And since then passed ten years. Gerard had seeing his family only for Christmas in Los Angeles a few times on his mother new house, but Mikey didn't mention Frank a single time. And Gerard never asked for him.

Gerard stayed in a hotel near Mikey's house and called his brother's girlfriend. Next day it was coincidentally Mikey's birthday so he supposed it was going to be a party for him, and his plan was to surprise him there. And Alicia said it was going to be in a bar they rented so she sent him the address and indications, trying to contain himself to not mention it to Mikey.

Gerard wished he was there because of Mikey and not for his stupid husband, but didn't say anything to Alicia. He could wait a couple days to have a shoulder to cry on...

"Don't forget to buy him a present" he told himself, but decided it must be better if he just bought a gift ribbon and put it on his head before entering the club. Mikey would believe he traveled just for him...

Next day he planned to stay at the hotel but he ended on a hair salon, just because he wanted to ask for a specific product he used to comb his hair but the girl who opened the door took him immediately to a chair and put a plastic layer on him.

"I want to get rid of the black..." he found himself saying, after an intense five-minute talk with the girl.

"I got the right style for you" she said, and like five hours after, he was blonde. But not the yellowish blonde tone. He had his hair white and short, and he felt more exposed than at any time in his life.

Eliza, the hair stylist was smirking and clapping, and he suddenly was surrounded by ten people saying him he looked good.

He always dyed his hair black, ever since he had like sixteen and heard Frank saying he loved goth girls, so he replaced his brown hair for a black tone and never stop with that color through the years. Long, black and messy. And now white, super short and his face exposed.

He almost felt regretful, but he always could be back with her and do something about darken his hair again. Or use a wig...

He dressed with one of the three t-shirt he took from his house in Scotland, one with a Rolling Stone logo and a leather jacket on. He took a look on the mirror and felt truly nervous because Mikey might laugh at his new look and be totally a dick about it, and he wasn't in the right mood to deal with self image troubles.

He gave the address to the taxi guy and scrolled through his phone, avoiding Grant's messages, carefully to not open one as a mistake.

Finally when he arrived to the club, he called Alicia and she appeared on the entrance with a huge smile and jumping around before hugged him and Gerard covered his mouth when she started to yell about how awesome was his new hair.

"Dude! Dude! Seriously!"she yelled "If you weren't gay and my boyfriend's brother...!"

"Ew! Gross! Let me go!" Gerard tried to untangled himself from Alicia.

"You eyes looks so green..." she said, squeezing his face like it was plasticine.

"But I'm still looking like me?"

"Yeah, of course, I could recognize you and all, but...it's a huge change...Something happened?"

"How a new hairstyle could be related to something bad happening?"

"It's what you do when something happens. All chick movies clichés said that. A breakup, for sure..."

"You are like a witch or something?"

"So it's a break up?" Alicia asked, partially shocked and trying to sound protective "Grant and you..."Gerard made an indescriptible sound at the mention of his traitor husband and Alicia interpreted it like it was a confirmation.

"Wanna talk before you go see Mikey?"

"Nah" Gerard said, and followed her after she rolled his eyes at him.

"You won't escape from a sister to brother talk later..."

The club was crowded and Gerard wondered why Mikey had like two hundred of friends if he was an antisocial weirdo like him when he left Jersey, but apparently ten years were enough time to fill an entire club.

He avoided people offering him a beer or a glass of whatever because he was fully sober since two years ago, after dealing with an alcohol addiction because of his job.

He didn't like meetings and social events, but Grant was a recognized member of the comic industry and after Gerard launches his own comic he started to be pretty famous too. And go to parties and events drunk was easier to do it sober. But after a bunch of events and parties, he felt bad and depressed because of his lack of social skills, and went with a friend who gave him pills. He started with drugs then and Grant started to worry about him, but did nothing, until he discovered the pills and how much he was drinking.

He spent a year on rehab in his own house, with Grant sending him therapist and buying art stuff which Gerard destroyed because of his mood changes, and was sober since then.

Alicia gave him a quick look before they got to the bar and Gerard rolled his eyes because yes, he felt good. He loved his brother's girlfriend, but sometimes he wished she didn't have the same overprotective behavior his brother had. She learnt it from Mikey.

Mikey opened his eyes surprised and started to push apart people to reach Gerard, and hugged him with too much force, like if he was the best gift he could receive on his birthday, and Gerard felt exactly the same, like two pieces fitting together.

"What are you doing here?" Mikey asked, after they stopped hugging each other for entire two minutes "I want the truth" he demanded, and Gerard almost started to cry because he didn't cry properly since he found out Grant wasn't at his mom's...

"Tell you later" he answered to Mikey, feeling his eyes irritating.

Mikey looked a bit intrigued and worried but Gerard gave him a look that said he wasn't going to talk in that moment so it was better if he didn't keep insisting.

Gerard greeted Ray Toro, and for a second felt an uncomfortable tingle crawling in his skin, because apparently Mikey still being close with their childhood friends so it could be possible Frank was there too.

"Can't believe you're here, dude!" Ray said, after a short hug too rude to his liking. He didn't felt well anymore. Seeing Ray was like seeing Frank.

And it didn't pass too much time after he saw him, with a glass on his hands, and before he could escape to the bathroom or just get out, Ray was waving his arm at him, and Frank saw him...


	2. Chapter 2

Gerard couldn't tell if Frank was angry or just unimpressed when their eyes met. He had the right to be angry with Gerard, and he felt embarrassed because he never imagined he would be in front of Frank again.

But he realized Frank wasn't angry, he was just trying to decipher if the blonde guy here was Gerard or not...

"Gerard?" He asked, and Gerard noticed Mikey behind Frank, shrugging because he invited his friends with not knowing Gerard would be there. Not his fault. And not his fault his brother was a coward who run away, Gerard thought.

"Hey, Frank" He shyly greeted him, rising his hand to him. And Frank smiled because it was the same gesture Gerard used to do when they were kids, salute people with his raised hand and his weird pinky finger. Of course it was Gerard.

"Oh, God!" Frank approached quickly and hugged him stronger than he was intended to but he couldn't help it. It was ten years of not knowing of him. Gerard responded to the hug even if he saw at the distance Mikey frowning and saying something to Alicia, a little angry "Can't believe you are actually here" he said, analyzing Gerard's face with his huge pretty eyes.

"Same as Ray told me" Gerard informed, hearing Ray's laugh behind, and before he could process everything he was carried to a sticky leather couch and had two guys at his sides talking non stop about everything.

He was a little uninformed of many things in Jersey, so they explained to him where the stores and things they used to visit ten years ago now are. They were more talking to each other than with Gerard, but at least they didn't hate Gerard for leaving. It was like going back in time.

At two in the morning, they were smoking and drinking and Frank announced he needed to get out to call home, and Ray went to greet some guy he didn't saw before. So Gerard forced himself to stand up from the couch and went with Mikey.

"Sorry" Was the first thing Mikey said, and Gerard didn't understand why. Well, he did but don't want to admit it.

"I never imagined you would be here, so I invited him because..."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I know how you felt about him and..."

"Mikey" Gerard sighed "It was ten years ago..." he said, trying to convince Mikey, and himself, but could feel his throat oppressed because his words were lies.

"Okay" Mikey didn't want to argue with him on his birthday, not after his brother was there in front of all for the first time in a decade "Want to go home?"

"I'm at the hotel"

"Fuck your hotel, we have a spare room, don't be silly, say you will stay with us..."

"Alicia is okay with that?"

"She couldn't stop saying how happy she was for having you here, dude!"

"Okay. I'm in"

Gerard slept in Mikey and Alicia's house, and went to the hotel next morning to grab his things and pay the stay. When he returned to the house, he heard from the door people laughing and bet a lung mentally that one of the ones laughing was Frank.

How could not? That devilish sound but cute at the same time was only produced by him.

"Sorry" said Mikey, whispering, when he opened the door for him, and Gerard rolled his eyes because he needed to stop Mikey with that. Even if he was right and he prefer Frank wasn't there.

"We brought food!" informed Ray, sticking his head out of the kitchen door "Hi, Gerard!" he said, and another head popped out from the door frame.

"Hi, Gerard" Frank repeated and smiled to him.

"Hi, guys..." he greeted them and five minutes later he was at the kitchen, helping them to serve the food from the cardboard containers to plates. They ordered Chinese food.

"Take care with that!" Alicia shouted, grabbing a plate from Gerard's hands, because she knew how clumsy he could be with porcelain things. Frank laughed hard because in ten years Gerard still being the same.

"Gerard!" Mikey yells at him from the backyard "Move your lazy ass right here and help me with this piece of shit!"

Gerard laughed and run to the backyard , and started to help Mikey to settle a folding table.It was a giant one, but doesn't seem too hard to set up.

"Maybe I should call Toro, he is smarter than you to these things, but I needed to talk to you..."

"What the hell do you want to talk?"

"Your husband called this morning" Mikey said, and for the terrified look in Gerard's face, he guessed something bad was happening.

"Shit"

"What happened?"

"Can we talk later?"

"Now or never. You know Alicia won't let me alone too much so..."

"Because you're stupid and could burn the house..."

"Yeah, but that's not the point right now. What happened with Grant?"

"I think we're going to divorce?" Gerard said, and Mikey step a bit closer, ready to hug him, but Gerard stopped him "He cheated with a guy. Probably not once."

"Fuck..." Mikey decided to hug him even if Gerard doesn't want to, but after he had his arms around his brother, he felt how he grabbed his arms trying to keep him close "Mom said she didn't like him, remember?"

"Yeah. Should listen to her when she evaluates my boyfriends..."

"But...are you okay?"

"I don't know..."Gerard felt his eyes filling with tears and he didn't stop them, not when finally he had somebody who can help everything better in some way "But I don't feel so bad..."

"You don't have to..."

"But he's my husband. I should be heartbroken but...I'm not"

"And what he said?"

"Grant said he's sorry and didn't want to ruin everything, but I didn't give him a chance to apologize or explain. I left him and If I'm honest...I don't think I'm going back..."

"Well, you know you can't do things like that. You're not eighteen anymore and you need to talk with lawyers and bring your stuff here..."

"I can call lawyers and send him a divorce letter"

"Gerard..." Mikey sighed "You must face your problems"

"Why? I didn't want to see Grant again. I don't wanna give him another chance, so why I need to go back with him?"

"Because you're an adult! You have contracts, a job, a house!"

"I'll just bought a new one here. I didn't care for material things..."

"Yeah? Your comic collection included?"

"I can arrange someone send here the things I want..."

"You're such a brat" Mikey petted his short hair, missing the long dark locks "Bad things happened to us too"

"What?"

"What happened?"

"Things that we couldn't even do anything about"

"What happened, Mikey?" Gerard asked, fearing that was something terrible.

"Now you're interested? Why?"

"Because you're telling me stuff! I wasn't here for so long..."

"I just want to show you people have worst problems than you do, and they face them, they don't have the chance to run away and pretend nothing happened..."

"Mikey, just tell me what the hell happened?"

"Remember Jamia?"

"Yeah, of course..." Gerard nodded, and Mikey dropped his arms and keep stood in front of Gerard. Of course Gerard remembered her. He was invited to the wedding years ago, even if he didn't talk with Frank anymore, but he didn't go. And heard from his mother that they had a baby, but he blocked that on his brain for his own sanity and never thought in Jamia or the wedding again. Like it wasn't happened.

"Jamia died two years ago" Mikey said, and Gerard was going to ask if that's a bad joke, but according to the hurt in Mikeys eyes, he wasn't kidding. He felt his knees weakened and have to grab Mikey again. 

"What happen to her?"

"Gerard, why do you want to know details?"

"Because she was...somebody I met once, and Frank's wife..."

"But you refused to know about us in a decade..."

"Yeah, sorry for that but...they didn't ask for me neither"

"That's what you prefer to believe. But no, they kept thinking they were your friends. Ray didn't stop asking me every year to send you greeting on your birthday, and Frank bought your comics. Every single one piece you put on a store is at his house, and he's really proud of you. Even if you don't care"

"I..." Gerard didn't know what to say. They stared at each other for a while, until Alicia appeared and yelled at them for not having the table settle down for lunch. "Grant cheated me" Gerard informed, because Alicia was an important member of his family and she was worried and deserved to know what the hell happened.

"Oh...that's why you're really here?" she asked, and Gerard nodded, helping Mikey "But you're okay?"

"He is okay" Mikey answered, a bit angry, but giving Gerard a friendly pat on his back.

Gerard tried to not look Frank too much. Not in a strange way but he couldn't help it. He looked good, aged so well that his jaw seem sharper and there were like hundred of tattoos all over his skin.

They all eat and talked about stuff Gerard understood partially, and he talked about his work, blushing every time they made surprised noises when he told he worked in some Spiderman shit.

At four in the afternoon they were talking and filling a heart shaped ashtray. Alicia bring more beers and coffee and all was like old times. Maybe they kept doing these things without Gerard, and was a natural talking for them, and for Gerard it was exactly what he needed in that moment. A familiar feeling was settled on his guts, every time Ray used his high-pitched voice to mimic someone, or every time Mikey rolled his eyes because of something stupid said by Alicia or Frank. He loved every part of it.

"Sorry, my phone..."Gerard explained, showing them his cellphone and the calling on the screen. It was Grant, and he thought in what Mikey said and decided to answer and talk to him "Hi, Grant" he said, walking inside the house, and took a sit in the kitchen, hoping he could be capable of talk to him without crying or yelling to the point of his friends and brother coming to see what was happening.

"Gerard..." Grant said, surprised because he didn't think Gerard would answer his call.

"I don't know when I'm going to return for my things. I didn't even know if I'm going to..." Gerard started, before Grant could talk, hating his voice and whatever he will need to say...

"Please..." Grant said, pathetically

"Please what? Do you really think this could be fixed just with that?"

"Of course it could! I'm sorry, I'm really sorry and I'm not going to give up on you like that. I love you, Gerard..."

"You cheated me!" Gerard yelled, realizing he was crying and hating Grant more for that, wiping his tears angrily.

"And I'm sorry! I don't know what to do now! All I know is I miss you and don't want to lose you..."

"We're over. Better you have that in mind..."

"It was just one time, I was so stressed because you were on therapy and..."

"Liar!" Gerard yelled, because his therapy was over a long time ago. "It's not a one time thing. Don't lie to me! You don't have to because I'm not gonna change my mind. We're over. I'm going to talk with lawyers and send you divorce papers as soon as possible. I don't want to see you again..."

"Gerard...What you gonna do without me?"

"I don't fucking care. I don't need you...And I'm not a person who could forgive something like that and you know it..."

"Do you think you could keep doing your job without me? They only want your things because of me!"

"Fuck you, Grant. Wait for the divorce papers and entertain yourself packing my things" he said and hung up the calling.

Gerard wiped his tears and was about to go to the bathroom to wash his face when he saw he wasn't alone in the kitchen. Frank was here and apparently he heard a good portion of his discussion and was frowning and biting his lip.

"That's why you're here. He hurt you..." Frank said, putting the plates he was carrying in the dishwasher.

"Don't worry, I'm fine" Gerard smiled sadly and tried to escape from the kitchen but Frank grabbed his forearm.

"Mikey said he was a good guy"

"Yeah, that's what people say about him"

"Are you okay?"

"Jesus! All keep asking me that!" Gerard yelled, and free himself from Frank's grip. But immediately regretted yelling to Frank because he was amazing and a good friend even if he was a piece of shit during ten years "Sorry, it's just...too much pressure and...maybe I need to go back to the hotel..."

"You know we are all here for you..."

"You shouldn't"

"Maybe not but we are family. We all care for you and it will be forever like that. We can't pretend be angry at you, because we are fucking happy to see you again..."

"Ray thinks that too?"

"Yeah, of course. And to your luck he's incapable to be angry with anyone..."

"I'm so stupid..."

"I'm not going to deny that..." Frank smiled to him warmly, and Gerard wanted to cry more, because he was the most kind person in the world and he didn't deserve friends like that. He didn't deserve having friends. But Frank was there, being nice and Gerard couldn't believe that in ten years he still feeling crazy for him. He looked even more handsome than ten years ago, still having the same big kind eyes with his perfect eyebrows, and have a lot of tattoos all over his body, like hundred of them, and Gerard always loved tattoos, because they were art, and Frank had only three when he left Jersey.

"Still living in the yellow house?"

"But is not yellow anymore. You should come with me someday. Only thing have changed is that I have kids now..." Frank said, his cheeks flushing like it was something pretty embarrassing to say.

"You're a fucking dad" Gerard said, smiling and suddenly remembering what Mikey said about Jamia. He didn't wait a second more to hug Frank, burying his face on his shoulder "I'm so sorry, Frankie..." Gerard sobbed, feeling guilty, and feeling Frank's grip on his back, tense and understanding that Gerard knew about Jamia "Sorry for not being here for you..."

"Don't worry about that" He had the courage to say, even if he felt like thousand knives burying in his soul "So, Mikey told you..."

"Not until today"

"I asked him not to tell you..."

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Because he said you were having problems with drugs and stuff, and apparently you were on therapy...You were having your own hell"

"But I would travel in a second if I had known what happened..." Gerard cried, and felt how Frank felt so strong and he didn't even tremble with the mention of the tragedy. Gerard loved that part of Frank. How he could be so nice and compassionate with others, but a solid rock with his own feelings, never let them take him from reality. And Gerard was the opposite, always feeling too much and clouding his mind.

"Really?" Frank asked, like he didn't believe him. And Gerard didn't know what to say. Maybe it wasn't true "Never mind, I don't want to ruin this day talking about that. I don't want you to go back to your life with more problems"

"I don't know if I'll come back to Scotland..."

"What?" Frank was impressed, but Gerard couldn't answer because Alicia and Mikey entered to the kitchen.

"What's going on? I want a hug too" Alicia said, and joined their embrace, breaking the intimate moment, but turning the sad vibes into laughs.

"I need to go home" Frank informed, while Alicia still at his side, slowly stepping back to release them "Tomorrow's Monday, you know" Frank explained "Kids go to school on Mondays, for you record"

"What about hang out next Friday?" Mikey proposed, starting to washing the dishes, before Alicia yells at him for being a lazy ass. They had that fight at least once a month, so he remembered the last time was specially bad and started to wash before she could protest.

"Sounds perfect" Frank smiled once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm trying to live between 2 jobs and doing this so please be patient, I'm always posting stuff. Love ya!


	3. A hopeless night

Gerard didn't do a single thing during week more than go shopping and following Mikey to his work. Not that Mikey had to do too much during day, in Gerard's opinion, because he was the owner of a coffee store with Alicia, so he did only administrative things like talk with banks and filling papers about money. It didn't look too complicated for Gerard, even if he didn't have a clue of what he's talking on the phone every time someone called.

"I'm bored" Gerard announced, when Mikey finished checking his emails.

"Do you think I'm your personal clown or something?" Mikey said, opening the car door because he needed to go to the restaurant "Some people aren't rich like you and needed to work. Why don't you go shopping again?"

"Fucking hate local stores"

"Why? Too cheap for your price range?"

"Stop that! I'm not that rich!"

"Yes. I saw your designer jackets"

"Grant bought them"

"And what do you want me to do with you? I need to work. What about visiting mom? Or try to resolve your fucking life? Buy a house?"

"Nice way to say you don't want me at your home anymore"

"Did you plan to stay with us forever?"

"Yes"

"Hope your kidding"

"Alicia said she was happy I'm here, so she doesn't have to see only your face on repeat every day"

"Yeah, but not until you would be sixty" Mikey sighed "You know, Toro and Frank worked in their record label and usually they don't have too much to do at mornings, unlike me" Mikey suggested, but after seconds passing and Gerard still stood on front of his car, he ran his hands through his hair, exasperated "Jesus, you're so annoying! Call Ray and ask him if he need help or something!"

"Okay! I'm going to call Ray. Or watch tv, whatever, let me die of boredom..."

When he pressed the button on the entrance at the address Ray gave him, a woman voice asked for his name before opening the doors. 

The first thing he saw was Frank, sit on the floor of a messy room and surrounded by pieces of instruments and stuff didn't know what it was.

"Gerard!" He greeted him, letting the stuff on the floor and running to him to hug him.

"Hi, Frank. Mikey ditched me..."

"Okay, it's nice to have you here. We didn't have too much to do today. I'm just packing some things, and ray went to buy coffee for us"

"Can I help you?"

"Actually, you can use this marker to copy the serial number of the pieces before we pack everything"

"Okay. I'm used to markers..." Gerard smiled and took a sit on the floor with Frank, who was putting wires and plastic stuff into bags "I didn't know you and Ray finally put the record label together"

"Yeah, we're in this for a couple years. It's so nice to help bands and we're composing stuff too"

"You always wanted this"

"Same as you always wanted to write comics"

"Yeah..." Gerard relaxed a bit more, trying to focus in the familiar sensation of being with Frank, rather to how well that shirt looked on him, with almost three buttons open, showing how his chest was also covered in tattoos. God...

Ray came with two coffee cups, smiling when he saw Gerard there.

"Hey, dude!" he greeted him, smiling and giving one cup to Frank. "Happy to see you here!"

"Hi, Ray" Gerard smiled shyly, and his eyes couldn't stop going to Frank's cup of coffee. It smelled wonderfully.

"We can share" Frank offered, smiling because he knew how much Gerard liked coffee, same as Mikey, and Gerard can't say no to that, so he took a long sip, humming contently after he taste the sweet scent of vanilla and some cinnamon.

"Hey, we can have lunch together!" Ray suggested, but Frank doesn't seemed to happy about that.

"Sorry guys, today's is parents meeting at school" he shrugged "Teachers said it was better to do it at lunch hour so every parent could be there"

"It's Miles or the twins?" Ray asked.

"Twins"

"What twins?" Gerard was shocked. Frank had twins? and another kid? He had three kids?

"Cherry and Lily. And Miles"

"Oh..."

"Yeah...I have twins and a little demon. Pretty impressive, huh?" Frank blushed lightly, trying to avoid Geard's eyes because he knew what was on his mind. He was thinking in how the hell he was taking care by himself of the kids, feeling pity for him, and Frank didn't want that. He was above the sadness of losing his loved one, he couldn't afford feeling sad anymore so he couldn't let people feel pity for him.

"So what if I we go later and see the kids? I missed them a lot..."Ray said, starting to work doing the same Frank was doing.

"I don't know..." Frank said, blushing again because he wasn't sure if Gerard had any interest in meeting his family.

"I want to meet them" Gerard said, smiling, feeling a strange bubbling in his gut, not in a bad way, he felt genuinely intrigued and wanted to be around his friends as much as possible before he needed to face his problems.

"Okay, maybe you could have dinner with us. Sounds good?"

"Yeah, I'm dying to see Miles, he's such a wild boy..." Ray said, and soon they were talking to Gerard about their studio and the bands they were promoting.

He spent the afternoon with Ray, seeing how he recorded some parts of a song they were working on, while Frank was outside with his kids.

At seven Ray locked all doors and let Gerard smoke before he get into the car, ready to go to the Iero's.

"Can't believe this place look the same..." Gerard said, looking through the window, noticing the park had the same trees, same benches and sculptures, and even there were the same swings he used with Frank, Ray and Mikey.

"You know Jersey can't afford remodelations..."

"Yeah, forgot that. In Scotland they build stupid bridges in the middle of parks all the time" Ray drove by the main street, mentioning to Gerard all the new stores that were put there, including one comic store.

"We bought your stuff there" he informed, and Gerard felt guilt. Why the hell he let all these years pass without his friends? "Okay, here we are, prepare yourself for the most cute baby boy you ever met..."

"Miles?"

"Yeah, he's two. The twins are six, still cute but definitely Miles is my fav" Ray said, Gerard raised an eyebrow "Can't help it, he's so funny"

Gerard followed Ray until he reach a small house with orange bricks and rose bushes in the entrance. Gerard felt anxious, because it was the place they stayed when they were kids, playing games and eating Linda's food. He never asked for Frank's mom, so he felt more anxious because he wasn't sure she was still alive.

He hoped that with all his heart.

"Who's there?" a tiny voice asked, across the closed door.

"It's Batman and Green lantern here" Ray said, using a stupid deep voice.

"Liar!" the tiny voice said, and Gerard heard more footsteps approaching.

"Get in, Lily! What did I told you about the door?" Frank's voice said, and next he opened the door. "Get in!" he repeated, more serious this time, and the girl who was hiding behind run inside the house. "Hey guys..." he greeted them and let them in, looking warmly to Gerard. "How was work?"

"Good" Ray answered "He's such a good company" he pointed to Gerard's direction "He helped me with the logo a little bit" he explained. They were trying to renovate the company's logo but didn't have time to hire somebody who could help, and since Frank only knew how to draw skulls and ghost, they put the renovation idea at the back of their priorities.

"Oh, Ray! I told you to not take advantage of Gerard for the logo!"

"Don't worry, I had fun doing it" Gerard said, following the guys inside the house.

In the middle of the living room were three child over the rug, surrounded by a few dogs who didn't pay much attention to the guests.

"Uncle Ray!" one of the girls yelled, and run to hug and kiss Ray. "Hello, sir, I'm Cherry" the girl said, smiling to Gerard. She had those huge eyes of Frank...

"Hi...I'm Gerard" he said, without knowing what to do or say, but Cherry kissed his cheek and then the other girl did the same after she hugged Ray.

The boy didn't stop looking at Gerard, with his tiny mouth open.

"This is Miles" Frank said, taking him in his arms and he slowly touched Gerard's face, impressed. "What happen, dude?" Frank asked to the boy, who looked astonished with Gerard. He moved in Frank's arms, trying to get hold by Gerard instead.

"Oh..." Gerard said, feeling so stupid because he didn't have an idea of what to do with kids, but Miles was determined to be hold by him, so he let him almost jump of Frank's arms and tried to sustain him while he was still looking him, impressed.

"I think he likes you" Frank said, and the girls giggled and run to the couch.

"Mommy" Miles said, touching Gerard's face with his tiny hand.

"He's not mommy, Miles" Frank said, laughing with Ray. "Come on, let him..." Frank tried to grab him but Miles cling in Gerard's neck, screaming.

"No!"

"Miles, come on, dude..." Frank said, but Miles refused to let Gerard. "Sorry..."

"I don't care...just don't know how to hold him properly..." Gerard said, trying to put his arms around Miles more firmly.

"You're doing good" Frank smiled. Miles was still looking at Gerard like he had some kind of spell "I don't know what's going on with this boy. Usually he would be jumping and screaming trying to made Ray play with him, but...he looks so quiet..."

"Yeah, I think you must hire Gerard as his new babysitter" Ray said, and they walk to the kitchen to help Frank.

Gerard let Miles touch his face and his hair, and talked to him but the boy was so occupied analyzing his face he didn't answer.

The house inside was pretty much the same, with a big kitchen, walls full of picture frames and a sweet smell in the air, same as when Linda was cooking something.

Gerard felt guilt again at the thought of Linda, he really wanted to know about her...

"How's Linda?" he asked, hoping she was good, holding his breath...

"Oh, mom's good. Living with dad in the beach house. Since we have more residents now they decided to let us the house and move to the coast. It's better for them, they're really good in there..."

"Glad to hear that" Gerard smiled, relieved, and put Miles onto his lap because his arms felt numb.

"I can't believe he's quiet..." Ray said, laughing at how Miles still being impressed with Gerard.

"Yeah, he's such a dick when I have a meeting here, but now he's so peaceful I think Gerard have some talent with kids..."

"Never had one that close..."

"Well, a natural undiscovered talent, then..."

They had to eat with Miles still in Gerard's lap, and by the time he needed to go to sleep he started to cry because he didn't want to let Gerard.

"Dude, he's going to visit you another day" Frank said. It was ten o clock, one hour late bedtime for them. Miles cried with such sadness that Gerard offered to stay with him until he fell asleep. "Okay, but he's sleeping in my bed. Since a stupid moth appeared in his room he refused to enter there" Frank explained, and pass Gerard some tiny pajamas for Miles, before he went to the twins room to put them in bed.

"I'll call a taxi later" Gerard say to Ray, who nodded and say goodbye to the kids. "Okay, little dude, I'll put you these..." Gerard showed Miles the clothing and he started to yank at the buttons, knowing it was time to change for bed. "Oh, so helpful..." Gerard praised him, and even if he hadn't change a kid before, Miles let him get off his t-shirt and tiny jeans and put him bed clothes.

He put Miles in bed, looking around and noticing that in one shelf were numerous volumes of comics, included his own works. Frank was the best. He still have a black flag poster in the corner, and a framed picture of Jamia and the kids besides the bed.

Miles grabbed Gerard's hand and forced him to lay on the bed.

"Oh, you want me to sleep here?" he asked, and Miles nodded. "Only until you are sleep..." Gerard said to himself, letting Miles hugged his arm, and he didn't know how much time passed, but he felt asleep.

"Shit..." he mumbled, looking around and seeing nothing more than darkness. He step out of bed, everyone were asleep, so maybe it was too late to call a taxi, but he could call Mikey...

"Hey..." Frank said, appearing in the kitchen, turning on the light and rubbing his eyes, tired.

"Why you didn't wake me?" Gerard whispered.

"I tried! I even throw you a sock but you didn't wake..."

"Shit, sorry..."

"Nah, Miles would be happy to see you if he awakes in the middle of the night"

"I can use the couch, where were you sleeping?"

"I have a spare room. It's not fully at use, but at least have a bed..."

"Frank, you could been kicked me..."

"No, Miles would be awake before you, dude..."

"I need to leave..."

"Why?"

"I don't want to disturb you or the kids..."

"They like you..." Frank said, but realizing maybe Gerard didn't like them. "You can sleep here, it's no problem. You know you're my friend, do you?"

"What? Why are you asking me that?"

"Because you still behave like you were afraid of us. I told you we're not angry. I'm not. I'm really ,really happy to have you here again. It's pretty weird, you know? But I feel like..."

"Like what?"

"I'll tell you but don't laugh at me"

"I'm not gonna laugh..."

"I feel like Jamia's telling me something...through you..." Frank said, embarrassed , looking the fridge door to avoid Gerard.

"Oh..."

"I know it sounds stupid, but..."

"I don't think so..."

"I was so sad, trying to keep this fucking life as normal as possible to make them happy and wishing they don't needed anything more than me and my parents, trying to push away my thoughts of Jamia, but...you came to my mind. Months ago. I thought maybe you were ill, or fucking dead so I wanted to ask Mikey about you but he didn't want to say a thing before, so I supposed now it will be the same, so I let that pass in my mind. But nor a month later, at Mikey's birthday you were here..."

Gerard didn't know what to say. Frank was there looking at him like he really wanted to hear something from him but he just couldn't say a word. He was afraid of screw all. Talking was never his thing, neither comfort people, but Frank seemed so hurt and tiny that he let his body took the decision of hug him.

It was the right decision. Frank hugged him back, and he felt calm and happy, thankful for having him in his life again. He let his nose inhale deeply into Frank's neck, feeling that sweet scent who reminded him to his long afternoons at Linda's kitchen, or when they were at school, hiding from teachers to eat candies they gained on Halloween...

"Missed you so much, Gee..." Frank said, touching Geard's arms, caressing him like he always did. He always have been that way, so close, so affectionate. 

"Me too..." Gerard said, shaking because Frank grabbed his face and was looking at him intensely. Just like he did when they were younger. That little things that started to play with Gerard's brain.

"Really?" he asked, looking into his friend's eyes. Gerard couldn't stop looking to his lips, so he stepped back, before he could do something stupid...

"Yeah, missed you all"

"Are you okay? About the separation..."

"I don't know, I'm trying to avoid that for a while, but I'm good"

"You know you can count with us to do whatever you need"

"I know..."

"Including breaking the motherfucker's nose if he appear here..."

"You were good breaking noses" Gerard laughed, remembering how much times Frank defended him of the bullies at school.

"You never wanted to learn" Frank smiled, turning on the coffee machine.

"You need to sleep" Gerard stopped him, knowing Frank wasn't going back to sleep if they have coffee. "You look tired"

"I'm good" Frank yawned "Just want to spend time with you..."

"I'm not going anywhere, Frankie..."

"You better not. I'm sure Miles will ask for you the entire week" Frank rolled his eyes, making Gerard laugh. 

"He's cute"

"Yeah, because now he's trying to look good, but normally he's screaming and trying to climb everything"

"Sounds like your son"

"Yeah, I know. Mom said he's exactly like me" Frank sighed "Don't you think it's weird? Last time we were here we were just these freaks who wanted to smoke all day and talk about Danzig's concert. Now we're talking about fucking kids and divorces"

"Yeah, but I'm okay with that...You always wanted a family"

"I'm a proud dad, I guess..."

"You must. I know you're a good one"

"Thank you" Frank yawned again, so Gerard insisted in go to sleep again, this time in the other room. He stupidly walk with Frank to his room, noticing only when he saw Frank stood at the door, looking at him sleepy... "Wanna sleep with us?" he joked.

"What? No..." Gerard said, blushing but Frank never noticed because it was dark. Why was he following Frank? "I'm going to the spare room..."

"Okay..."

"Good night"

"Good night, Gee" Frank smiled, and kissed Gerard's cheek, before get into his room with Miles. Gerard moved slowly to the other room and don't sleep a second until next morning, being shaked of his bed for the twins, who wanted to made him pink pancakes for breakfast.


	4. New life, new dog?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little snack until longest chapter is ready :)

After thousand attempts, Grant stopped calling Gerard or Mikey, and Gerard finally started to look for a new house.

Right after he settled in a small house near Mikey's, he received invitations for meetings from a new comic company. Rumours spread fast, even when he didn't feel like someone famous, his ex husband was pretty much a recognized author, so it was easy that media knew exactly what he was doing and suddenly he started to get offers and proposes from another companies.

"What are you doing tonight?" Mikey said, after he bring some coffee and donuts to Gerard's new house "Are you sure you like this place?" He asked, because it was a normal house with no furniture, no heating, and no indications of being cleaned in a month.

"It's temporary" Gerard said, with a pencil on his hand, doodling something on a piece of paper.

"If you said so. But what are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing special. Just stay here and chill, I'm working on something..."

"Can't. Alicia is having this dinner with parents..."

"Her father still hate you?"

"Yeah, but I'm planning on marry her soon...so what he think of me doesn't matter"

"Are you serious?" Gerard stopped with his pencil and look Mikey's face. Even if he didn't show much emotions through his face , Gerard knew when Mikey was nervous or planing something. "She will say yes?"

"I don't know, Gerard! You shouldn't make me doubt!" Mikey yelled, throwing a donut in Gerard's face.

"Sorry, but I never imagined you wanted to do this. You're my baby brother..." Gerard tried to reach him to tickle him but Mikey step back.

"She deserves a party, a ring, a dress... this is how I can say to her I'm really serious about our relationship"

"She knows..."

"Yeah, but l really want to do this"

"When do you plan to do it?"

"I don't know, but it will be at our house, nothing fancy, just us and you guys...If I propose at her parent's I'm gonna be dead in a second...Her father have this shotgun..."

"Just invite us for dinner and put the ring on his salad"

"How romantic" Mikey slapped him on the arm, making his pencil flew to the other side of the room "When you married that asshole, I never was so mean with you..."

"Don't speak of the man now..." Gerard sighed, grabbing the pencil form the floor and throwing it at Mikey..."I'm trying to get a lawyer..."

"Finally!"

When Mikey left, Gerard wasn't in the mood for keep working in the house so he thought it was a nice day to get out and draw in a park.

It was sunny but as it was early at morning Gerard sit in a wood bench, starting to smoke, enjoying the effect of the sun on everything around. It was calming, but his peace was destroyed by a car braking heavily on the street.

No one around, Gerard stood and walk closer to the car, noticing a tiny creature under the vehicle. The driver noticed too, but decided to scape and let the injured dog dying there.

"Shit" Gerard didn't know what to do. He doesn't like dogs. He had a dong once but he only petted her on his head a few times and let his mother take care of her until the dog was old enough and died.

No one was around. He forgot his phone, and he couldn't let the tiny creature there, so he reach the dog and saw him breathing, his eyes completely open and his chest moving agitated.

"Hi..." he said, touching his head and the dog licked his hand "Please don't die...please don't bite me..." he pleaded, holding the dog and seeing no blood and no evident wounds.

He walked with the dog asking people for a vet, finally finding one at the end of the street.

The dog wasn't dying, it was a male young dog, so he even didn't have a fracture, just a contusion on his leg, but he will survive and just needed to take a nasty crab flavoured medicine.

He wasn't microchipped, so it means he had no owners.

"What's this?" Mikey yelled when he entered to Gerard's house the next day, being received for a tiny dog moving his tail non stop. "Gerard!!" Mikey yelled, laughing because the dog was licking his shoes.

"Found him hurt on the street. A car hitted him but he's alright. Don't you want a puppy? I heard Alicia saying she wanted one..."

"Liar. We have two cats. They hate dogs" Mikey rubbed the dog's tummy "What's his name?"

"I don't know. I thought Justice was a good name but he doesn't respond when I called him..."

"Justice? Really? Who are you? A Kardashian?" Mikey said, taking the dog in his arms "He's tiny. Do you bought food? plates?"

"Huh?"

"Dogs eat too, Gerard"

"I'm not planning on keep him"

"Well, but until you get him a home and a family, he must stay here and eat. Why don't you call Frank, he loves dogs"

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. I'm working in like hundred of stories at the same time, sorry 😞 This story is finished, but with a lot of things to correct, so I'll post it complete eventually. Love ya!


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